Just mADE A PArabola og urine
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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