I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
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This show inspires me to have sex in space
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
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it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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