would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Farmville is her only friend.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
