I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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