my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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