Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize