I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
