Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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