I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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