Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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