If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
