i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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