Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
