i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
