Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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