We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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