man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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