He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
