Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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