508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
