How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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