the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
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