3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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