glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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