You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
