so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Randomize
