I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
