new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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