This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
