I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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