She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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