I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I'm passing your future prison.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.