You really coming over, don't trick.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on