I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME