I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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