if i can run in heels then i can drive
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Randomize
