If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
