dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
