If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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