Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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