shes about as inviting as chlamydia
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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