Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Randomize
