i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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