Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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