I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
