No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
