apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize