just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
