She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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