Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
