How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
