I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
id be glad to
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
