Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT